At age 8, I was diagnosed with a combination of migraine, cluster and tension-type headaches. Many migraineurs have suicidal thoughts, and I once read that clusters can be more painful than an accidental amputation. Over the past 24 years, my migraines have become intractable—pain 24/7. New research suggests that constant headaches may cause the brain to lose its natural ability to fight pain. I fight anyway. This chronic condition isn't always visible to others. Sufferers are trapped in a different dimension, one between life and death, where invisible assailants take up permanent residency. The curse and the blessing of this existence are the same: It won't kill you.

Currently there's no cure for a migraine, but there's a loophole in the devil's plan: This brain disorder can be managed. And that's what I cling to in my search for healing. Read more about Susanne's remarkable story of everyday survival.

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From the September issue issue of O, The Oprah Magazine. Subscribe now!